I've tried with this instrument several times now. This is the first time I feel like I'm actually getting anywhere. I think it's the third time, but who's actually counting?
Since I was young, I've loved music. I was raised to love music; it's in my blood to love it. And I've written poetry nearly since I could write. At some point writing poetry blurred into writing, probably terrible, songs, which turned into writing decent songs, but still never fully bringing them to completion. It probably sounds a bit asinine, but for a long time I've felt like I would be a more whole person if I played an instrument. Probably because music is important to me; it's like being a romantic but never having been in love.
I've tried to learn three instruments, of which guitar is the one I'd wanted to learn most and none of the rest ever stuck. I always felt like the guitar and I would get along; we would be good together. But it's also so incredibly confusing to me. I just have this feeling that there's this barrier I have to get past where all of a sudden it will click. The thought of which scares me.
See, I am the type to see the potential in everything, but to sell myself short and so, sit still. I got this feeling in the spring, that I should pick it up again, and try again; really try. A guitar came my way, and I clipped my finger nails (a big step for me). And I clipped them again. I picked that thing up and I fought it, for a while. I was frustrated, but I persisted. I went out of my comfort zone to do lessons - hit strings in front of people! For the first time I feel like I'm actually getting somewhere.
Maybe it's because I'm in a place where I have space for it. I understand a bit more about learning and the privilege it is. I'm in a place of seeking what I have to gain, and moving on it. Now I'm only left to persist. And keep clipping my nails.
(And now that I've written this, I definitely have to stick with it...right?)
