I really should clean my room today to make an area to keep my new printer and laptop. The problem is I don't feel like it. Maybe it's the waking up to talk radio, maybe it's the reading text messages first thing (it usually serves me badly, you think i'd learn to wake up a while before reading texts). Maybe it's the fact that I'm realizing I start school in 10 days. 10 DAYS. I don't want to, spare me? Why I'm dreading it so much this time around, I don't know. I just know I'm horribly unexcited. I did absolutely nothing this week. It has been such a dull week, and I think that's when I get really afraid of adding more time consuming things onto my daily schedule; when time is flying by me and squirming out of my grip.
I have this theory: if we watch time go by, it either goes by too fast or too slow. I've never watched the clock tick by at a happy medium.
I am just kinda bummed out cause my summers were getting progressively better each year and this one has sucked. Quite frankly, it did. And it gets to me more because I have this ultimatum, this looming fate of going back to school, not this monday, but the next. And then so many things are going to be changing, I feel like I'll be too busy to notice. It's almost, on a subconscious level, like this summer has sucked, and hence will this fall.
The only sparkling glimmer of hope I have is that it's all in God's hands, and He will do what He wills.
