I am the heart-on-sleeve sort of person. For the most part, there's not a whole lot I'm not willing to divulge if asked, - granted I feel the one inquiring won't turn on me, no matter how big or small the issue.
It's funny because I think of myself as really open, as stated (sorry, i'm redundant...a lot), but I come to a point where I decide whether or not to share my true heart. There are a lot of things to tell someone, that are involved in the true heart of a person; that really are at the core. Some things are dreams, hopes, interests, - whatever kinds of things, the kind that are less difficult (at least for me) to share.
But I feel like at the heart of me, the core the part you have to truly earn trust to get to is pain. I'm sure it's that way for a lot of people, as well as the nice stuff, the stuff I consider easy to blab about.
I get to this point, when I feel like it's been earned, that I can share my true heart. That core of me. Because as much as the happy things, and all the times I've ever laughed, and joked and smiled - as much as those things are important to me, I feel like the things that really make you in life are the ones that were the most painful.
People who know me, may feel like they know me pretty well, and why not? I post a status or a tweet every couple hours. I write blogs. I tell stories. I post pictures. And whatever else. Like I said, pretty open. But those people probably wouldn't look at me and say that I've experienced a lot of pain in my life. Whether or not I can say that, I don't even know. My question is, what's a lot?
I think this is interesting because you might think you really know someone, then you learn more of their story, and it changes them in your eyes. I've had this happen multiple times. And I'm sure the same has happened for people with me. I think when you get down to the nitty-gritty stuff, in the muck, and examine the scars (to be cliche), that's when you can relate to someone the best, even if you've never been through what they have.
A lot of people, even like me are really excellent about looking perfectly normal, happy-go-lucky, and fine like they've never cried a tear in their life, but everyone sees pain at some point in life. And I think that to know another person's pain is (weirdly) a deeply bonding thing.
I have this theory about relationships: it's not real (real meaningful, that is) until you can talk about your poop. Hear me out. Like pain, everybody poops, but nobody talks about it unless they're really comfortable with someone, unless that relationship is really solid. When you can talk about the crap in your life, that's a really meaningful relationship.
So sometimes, I look at someone and I think to myself, when should I talk about what's ever really mattered to me?
