Go figure, I'm either totally procrastinating the REAL planning I need to do for the billion and one changes that are to befall me next semester, or I'm freaking out about it. I'm finding there is no such thing as a happy medium when it comes to my feelings about the future. (Ironically listening to John Mayer's "No Such Thing" haha).
Some of the stuff like what I'm going to do for a job when I get out of school...I don't really want to think about that, who job searches before they even have a degree anyways? Gosh! Then there's the little bit about where I'm going to live next semester...haha. Um yeah, haven't planned that out in the least! I should probably start saving the first month's rent/deposit...but have I thought of that before today? Nope. That thought just occurred.
So basically, i freak out about finding a job after school, even though i think it's absurd to even worry about cause it'll be a while; and i don't think about the apartment as much as i probably should (cause i promised myself I would not live at home).
I'm excited and scared at the same time. I'm so used to Normandale, life is simple there. Classes aren't always simple (not as much as people might think), but everything else pretty much is. Then there's the U of M which is like opposite, it's like it's own little world...but in a different way than Normandale is.
This will be the first time I've ever admitted this, but here goes: I'm a little afraid I won't fit it as much as I'd like to think. Yup, first time that's been owned up to, haha. I've lived in the 'burbs my whole life, not the city. I should just do this all blindly, make it my own learning experience. I've got to stop asking people questions or even listen to their [unwanted/unwaranted] advice about what i should do and should worry about and should prepare for and should re-think. If i make a mistake it'd be no different than any other day of my life, haha. Or anyone else's for that matter. So I think i just convinced myself that I shouldn't worry about any of it...plan it, yes; worry, no. Good thought-airing!
